Slave's Slide

Here is a quick blast for the weekend:



The band Slave on Youtube, performing their classic laidback funk "Slide"

Man, I'm sitting down, but that can't stop me from twisting around in my seat-
that's how good this song is. Little blasts of horns, guitars all slinking around. They keep the words few, so you can just ride the beat. Words like "I ain't gonna bite ya, I just want you to hang on [or out?]."

This album is really great. I think it is also called "Slave", which makes this hard stuff to search for on the internet.
Much of it isn't on Youtube (only this song, as far as I can see); I know, I know, that seems impossible. But trust me, looking around for Youtube clips to post, for some of this stuff, just doesn't do nuthin'.
This is not even some way-out-there obscure stuff.

(See explanation below...)

I mean, look at where this song is from, at least for this particular clip: from a "pure funk classics" mix, right? So not underground like moles or anything. But still, the other songs I love off this record, like "Screw Your Wig On Tite", "Son of Slide", "Separated"- not to be found.
In fact, YouTube has a clip about slaves being separated, but not "Separated" by Slave. Not real slaves- it is some contest to edit Prince of Persia, King of Pharaoh type stuff. ??!??

I don't get it; maybe one of you 4chan types can explain this. Also, could someone explain why "4chan" does not get spell-checked, but "Youtube" (and even "YouTube") does?

WHAT KIND OF CRZEE WORLD IS THIS?
And Crazy Continues: here is the explaino-convo about "bersenberber" above--> 4Chan-esque funny-esque fud mzspillin, aka internet food misspellings.



ha huh huh !

This Is Not A Joke

I've been watching some more movies lately, a few of them Westerns.
Also been listening to almost only old records. A few of them old country.
A nice fit, that.


YouTube video of a fun and funny old tune, "Evil on Your Mind" by Jane Morgan
Download an even better version here: "Evil On Your Mind", Judy Lynn

Most Westerns that I've seen awfully serious, though, and a lot of classic country is joshing, joking around. Not too surprising: why would ('western') film have anything to do with ('country and western') music?
I mean, a silly case in point: old western movies are in black and white; old C'n'W music is neither black'n'white nor in color.
Because music is invisible.
(However, music is not immaterial, or non-physical: sound is nothing but moving air and the vibrations that air causes in your body.)
My point is, the arts don't really have that much in common; they are more distinct than similar.
Which is part of the reason that music doesn't need words, as I boldly and clearly stated in the last post.
Words are poetry, or literature. Music is not poetry, or literature. You don't demand that all your paintings have words in them, do you?



"Keep your Apollonian Narrative off My Dionsysian Body!" That's what I say!

But, that said, if you are going to have words, you might as well tell a story. Country does that: old or new, perennially telling stories. If you must use words, I implore you: instead of mouthing vacuous truisms (which are so vague as to become false), create a character, have interactions that make something happen (but please, don't try to 'make a point', pffff), or at least, crack a joke.

Just Pokin' Fun

Phew, back at it. Last post was Bill Withers, who really lets you know how he feels about things. Doesn't really mince words lyrically, that guy.
"Use Me"? Tells you that you can keep on usin' him, cuz he's sure 'nuff using you, to do the things you do.


That track "Who Is He, And What Is He To You" (which you can download here), from the last post?

"When I add the sum of you and me
I get confused when I keep coming up with 3,

You're too much for one man
But not enough for two,
Dadgummit
Who is he and what is he to you?" Yeah, Bill said that.

Bill also tells you that grandad used to whup him a bit, when he was acting up. Same song: says grandma used to help the young girls who got knocked up. In "You", he disses his girl for the kinds of parties she goes to
,
and her headshrink. Bill doesn't need any of that hooey.

So callin' 'em like he sees 'em; pullin' no punches.
Reminds me of a mix series that will be coming out soon. (On this here blog, see.)
Called Real Talk. Selections will drop lyrical bombs, leave snares of nasty talk, destroy friendships, ruin lives. Words that cut and run. Descriptions of human behavior that will make you say, "Man is a wolf to man", but, hey, we've all seen it before.

Now if this sounds depressing or cruel- it's not. The series got inspired by R Kelly's Real Talk, and you will recall: that song is nothing but funny.


Most of the songs are just pokin' fun.
Aretha Franklin praises Dr. Feelgood. A Kurtis Blow production ponders the "Games Females Play"; other females have a "Meeting in the Ladies Room" (by Klymaxxx), where they either put on more makeup to seduce a man, or do some cocaine.
Not the only song that will discuss drugs in blunt terms (cough), or sex in a non-sentimental fashion.

The whole mix: just people being real. Really Real.

Other in utero mixes right now are Poker Jams, where I cull and collect songs from old records, songs that both Ben and Sue would want to listen to in her kitchen. Not an easy task- Ben likes shit that nobody's ever heard of, and Sue likes it fun. She does not think that the Frogs are fun.
(whoa, Myspace link! Haven't seen one of those in a while!)
She's probably not interested in songs on 78 wax cylinders. He's probably not interested in bands where girls sing about boys.


Another called "Talky Singy". Songs with spoken bits at some points, or lyrics that are barely sung. Not going to focus on rapping, because that would be cheating, yes?

Another one selecting ONLY songs that have some sort of sound effect in them. The roaring, and wrecking, bike of "Leader of the Pack": Check!
The occasional train horn: oooh, sounds lonely.
Click-clack of guns: M.I.A., any B'more track, NWA?: Abbrev's!
The crack of the whip, in "Ox Driver" or the O'Jays "Ship Ahoy"?: Oh, Snap!
etc, etc
You are all so vitally enthused right now! Patience! Any recommendations, directions, suggestions, emendations, rejections, pretensions, gesticulations, and such: drop a comment. Tell me which mix you'd prefer I get finished first.

Specific Obscene Enjoyment

On Facebook, some degenerates who I know have added an app that tells you your ten most-used words. Accurately, a friend described El Jefe's as resembling an angry haiku.
Now, I - and you too; hell, all of us - would love to know what my words are. But I refuse to let FB all up in my Face by adding stuff.



Instead, I present the following accidental poems. Stochastic or Tyche-type Poesy. These are quotes that begin and end the passages that I wanted my students to read. I didn't write them out so that they would make rad short bits;
BUT THEY DID because this is exactly the kind of RAnDom (=rad+random, see?) stuff that intrudes into my life.

‘There I had already learned…message was “I don’t care”.’
‘This notion of the imaginary…not being part of American reality.’
‘What if, then, there is no ‘normal role’?...or not in the expected way.’
'Is that why so many examples…take the risk and have a position.’
'In combination with psychoanalysis…threatening to explode.’

‘With the logic of Real-as-impossible…between the object and das Ding.’
‘Your analysis of contemporary…void filled by appearances.’
‘By the late 1980s profound…there is no way out for them.’
‘In your work you have…even more radical and intrusive.’

‘the problematic of Franz Fanon…potentially redemptive disciplinary drive.’
‘And in contemporary…racist, chauvinist or whatever.’
‘And against this abstract machine…the eyes of its own people.’
‘This idea of de facto closure…justifies absolute ruthlessness.’
‘On the other hand…specific obscene enjoyment.’


I taught Slavoj Zizek for my last weeks of class. It seemed to go well.
Partly because I soft-pedaled some of the more difficult ideas.
Partly because I taught Zizek as if he were Freud. Concepts like the Oedipus complex (You want to f**k your Mother! You will kill, and then supplant, your father!
Stop thinking those asterisks look like buttholes, you pervert!)
are not that hard to grasp, although they may be a little hard to swallow.


Stop It!

Ideological Pubic Hair: Zizek Enjoins you to Kill All Hippies

Yes, I'm deferring grading, and my super-ego is raging about it.
But you can take a little break with me. Watch the YouTube video below. It is Slavoj Zizek, talking about toilets and pubic hair, and how they both reinforce (or at least symbolize) ideological constraints.
No, honestly, that's what he says.



and yes, I am teaching him, and themes just like these, in my class. Right now -yesterday, tomorrow, which added together are today- in my introduction to philosophy class.
I got the book for free too: B O O M .
I said for a while too that I must be Zizek's secret (whoops, typed "sextet": Freudian Slip!) love child. Because we are both hyper.
I also declared, since he has a bit of a tic where he touches his nose all the time, that he had sucessfully passed through oral, anal, AND phallic stages. Where does that put him?

The Nasal Phase!

WanderLust

Albert Camus famously (well, even "cliche-edly") wrote that there "is but one truly serious philosophical problem, and that is suicide."
I take this problem much more seriously when grading student papers.

Likely, the best option would be to somehow lead the papers themselves to commit suicide, instead of myself.


( Facebookers, view "Lovers Who Wander" by Dion on Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=buP1_OhjP5o )

([{Download "AMX: Unsafe at Any Speed", my most recent mix. It, of course, includes the above song.}])

Ah, but a reason to live! Like a crocus, leaping forth from the earth in earliest spring! Like an olive branch of peace, borne across vast oceans! Like a jellybean, delicious if artificial, rolling about my mouth!
Like a drumbeat built for speeeeeeeeeeeed!
.....! with handclaps, even !.....

The above song is by Dion, not Dion and the Belmonts; small detail, except that with the Belmonts, Dion made much less rokkin' tunes. This one swings, really has some of that ol' pep that this mix, friends, has in spades.

Oh papers, your weight, carried it seems for millennia, nearly grinds me to dead dust. And yet the waters of life flow from the ever-renewed spring that is
"AMX: Unsafe at Any Speed":

Healing waters which consist of doo-wop, early rock 'n' roll, "guitar freakouts", and all manner of leather-clad rebels, plain white tees and jeans, and a 'little sis' who can do the Mashed Potato.



Yes, 'Teachers who Wander", wander from the flat affects of required classwork, toward the NeverNeverLand of the Internet. A Musical Mecca to which The Teacher is guided by a profound wanderlust. Oh verily, these papers
"broke my heart, I really showed it,
Look at me now [after downloading "UNSAFE AT ANY SPEED"], you'd never know it
Now my story can be told with a smiling face
I'm the luckiest guy in the human race".

Yes, I traded drudgery for funnery, poorly constructed sentences for expertly-wrought musical mixes. I now pass on the possibility of your own, similar transition. Listen, learn, love, licent, etc., all with the help of "Unsafe At Any Speed.zip", the lovely and lively zip file that contains the above song, as well as many others.

Children in Bars 'n' Drivers in Cars

Today is nice, so I will tell you a (nice) story from the other nice day.

Young Turks - Rod Stewart

{{ This song is just great. I'm thinking I'll play on my BBC Essential Mix, when I am finally a world-befamed DJ. }}

First, let's just state, forthrightly and with feeling, that I saw extra clowns.

Not only are clowns notable as such, but the first one was outside of a bar, getting ready to do her thing.
Of course, since she's a clown, she's got a bunch of kids around her, all ready for balloons and jokes and smiles and BEER i guess, because it is a bar after all. Also, clowns=fun and beer=fun, so Beery the Cheery Clown must be FUNfunFUN.


I also saw a few clownish things:
Outside of Rob's comic shop, I saw a giant inflatable HULK ( ! Hulk Smash ! ), so I went in and said Hello to him.

I later saw a giant inflatable cross, with a nipple on it --IT'S ART : DON'T HAVE A COW MAN!!-- that was printed with the pattern of a Holstein cow.

I did a clownish thing: while walking out of Old City Coffee, I hooked the handle of my umbrella on the door. I then made a face, which included a smile (clowns smile or frown: always one-or-the-other). Amelia saw me and laughed, because that's what clowniness makes you do. Also, it wasn't raining that day, so it was like a prop, this umbrella, and clowns love props.



I also saw lots of poor driving, as if there were 8 clowns in the car: all harmless. Lots of turning left from the center lane: eh, who cares. My magnamanity regarding other people's various shortcomings is really touching, I think. It's the sort of thing you could totally praise me for, basically non-stop.
And you can also praise me for the bounty of my blog, which is about to increase a fair bit. My time zone is now "summertime". So you will get a more-frequently logged blog. In fact, just in the last week or so, here are some topics, mixes, etc., that I have thought about generating.

Gary Numan: "Are Cars Electric?"

Putting pickles in salads : Good but intense (identical to me in this regard). Strictly, they were cornichons, 'cos I'm quality, but cornichons are just glorified, if glorious, pickles.

Maybe something about PJ Harvey, since she has a new album and will tour in Philly soon. June 7th (??...Tix as Birfday Gif...??)

A blog about blog-driven connections, including the world's oldest pharmancy, paintings and mom-as-muse(-maybe?). Oh, what's the connection? You Will Have To Tune In To See!!


Mixes:
"You can't even DRIVE yet!"

This would be drawn from CDs I've owned forever that are still classics -They can't just be old (I must have bought them long ago too), or obvious gems, like say Neil Young. They have to be something you might care, or need to, learn about. Aphex Twin-, Stone Roses-type things.

Underrated Albums or Bands; can we call this one "Slept On"? Elegant, innit?

More versions of "Shower Jamz!", which Kyle liked (Cf. Previous Post)

"Talky No Singy": songs where the singing is more talking than singing. No, not rap, ya goof. So far I'm considering Billy Bragg, this Pretenders song, Lou Rawls, maybe Sonic Youth (because they do this, but are they really that great?: jury's out man), Suicide, Jonathan Richaman's "Monlogue about Bermuda", which I talk about with regularity. Arab Strap too, natch.
Suggestions welcome for any of these, by the by.

So I was talking with this Clown...

Really guys! I was!

There was a guy sitting in his car outside my house, putting on pancake makeup, while I was ripping new songs from new vinyl*. He got all dressed up, in full clown makeup and a tux and a Phillies (2008 World Champions) hat.
Later, he asked me "How do I get back to the real world?".
He wasn't high, or crazy (unlike some clowns...).
What he meant was, "How do I get back to Center City?".

One of the tracks I got today was this, which, due to the combination of its greatness (you gotsta listen to it) and its non-obvious nature, proves that I am a Wax Witch, which is like a water witch, but with records. I am basically a vinyl sleuth.

Meeting In The Ladies Room - Klymaxx

I am pretty sure that they were having clown tryouts at the studios across from my house today, because later, I saw a young kid go in, carrying clothes from the dry cleaners and a suitcase.
(See, I've deduced that he was a clown, because kids don't have dry-cleaning! Elementary, my dear whoever you are.)
I am really hoping that the 'case had some serious, even-better-than-Conrad-style magic tricks in it.


* Today, I got more Billy Paul; in fact, this album


a soundtrack (to the movie Perfect, which we've never seen, but has Jamie Lee Curtis and John Travolta, when he was till dancing) which has on it: a Jackson, the Pointer Sisters, the Thompson Twins (brothers, not sisters), Wham!, Whitney Houston, and ,,uh,, Lou Reed.

Also, Sonny & Cher (better than you think, balee' dat),
a 12" single by Snap,
a 45 called "Folk Attick Presents:--", which a little lacking in the soul department, because they are British, and this is from when 'folk' meant "Negro Folk Music" (as the sleeve says), meaning the blues. British people didn't grasp the blues until like the 60's- hell, they didn't learn to rap until AFTER the French.
an epic album called !Magician's Hat! by Bo Hansson


and Charlie Rich (AKA "The Silver Fox"), which used to belong to Cuyahoga County Library, of Cleveland Ohio: not kidding! It was Dewey Decimal'ed as M783.7 R37SI, if you don't believe me.

And, as stated, the single for THE ABOVE SONG: Klymaxxx "Meeting in the Ladies Room".
I've been sleuthing around for that track for a bit now. It was on an mp3 mix (?Diplo? perchance), which means that I didn't know who it was.
She says at one point, "Don't slap me: I'm not in the mood".
Huh? I dunno: this song is confusing. For instance, it appears to not be about cocaine, which you might think, but about man-stealing. But ((CONFUSING!)) she then leaves her man alone while she has a conference (in the Ladies Room) with her girls about it? Eh, maybe it is about coke. Ask Conrad about it?, two weeks to the day.